Marathon

Marathon runs in my family. My great-grandfather worked the oil boom for the company that later became Ohio Oil (maybe Standard Oil), which later became the Marathon Oil Company. My grandfather worked the oil fields straight out of high school and worked his way up to regional managment of the oils fields of Crawford County/Southern Illinois and Indiana. My dad, one year and 3 three months after I was born returned from Military service to work for Marathon. A few years later my Uncle, (my mother's brother) got on with the Marathon Pipeline. I come from a strong race of Marathon men.

I remember in the 80s when Exxon Moblie was threatening to buy out the company and everyone I knew gathered around the county courthouse for a parade/demostration. I was young, but I remember it as vividly as the bright red shirt and hat I was wearing. The shirt said in large white letters (My Dad and Grandpa Work for Marathon, and the back I think it said "and uncle too") I remember the feeling of solidarity and deep and abiding purpose. Of wanting whatever it was that everyone else wanted...so badly!

My granddad has since retired, My dad has over thirty years in with the company (now Marathon Ashland), and my uncle spends much of his time at the company headquarters as a trusted advisor to the big cheeses. While I don't have pumpjacks, injection wells, and tank batteries in my future, I have recently joined their ranks....

Growing up I remember that the gas station on the corner of Adams and Main in Oblong had a large oval sign with a half naked Greek runner on it. The sign said; "Marathon Best in the Long Run." That runner was Pheidippides the runner said to have run the 26.2 Miles from Marathon to Athens to bring the news of the battle. As I understand it he died. Thankfully I didn't

Today I ran 26.2 miles as a participant in the Chicago Marathon.

Now I'm a Marathon Man too...

Space...The Final Golden Calf

I decided to click on my own blogger profile today and I then decided to click on the book "The Man Who Was Thursday" by GK Chesterton.  I wanted to see who else in the world listed this book as a favorite.  I found a German twenty something who likes punk rock and heavy drinking.  But I also found someone named Stacey...  From Stacey's profile I found a link to something called - Solomon's Porch - http://www.solomonsporch.com/

Dig this quote:  "Solomon's Porch is a community seeking to live the dreams and love of God in the way of Jesus. As part of this effort, we maintain a meeting space at 100 W 46th Street in South Minneapolis. While we use our facility for Sunday evening worship gatherings, Bible studies, meals, internet café, art exhibitions, and events, we are very aware that our community exists wherever the people of Solomon's Porch find themselves. In this way, our Christian lives are not limited to what we officially do in our meeting space, but are expressed through our lives."

What other Spaces are limiting the way I do life?  Causing me to unnecessarily compartmentalize things that were intended to be a healthy part of the greater whole?

Cut to .5 by Darth Vader

"Nothing could be better for an entrepreneur then to have their company shut down by Apple or Microsoft. It's like Obi-wan getting cut in half by Darth Vadar with the knowledge that you'll come back stronger. Apple cuts your startup in half and you're made for live--you were killed by Steve Jobs. Wear it like a badge of honor."
--Calacanis

Trying Something New

This is my first shot at using Windows Live Writer to write a blog entry.  So far it's kind of cool. I am about to hit publish and we'll see how it looks.

Just call me Pheidippides (kind of)

On May 6, 2006 I ran 13.1 miles through the streets of Indianapolis, Indiana. Here are some key points.

1. 13.1 miles = exactly 1/2 of a marathon, which = 26.2 miles, or the distance between the ancient Greek city states Marathon and Athens.

2. It is important to note that I was not being chased by a dog or coerced into doing this.

3. I finished in 2 hours 47min. Slightly ahead of the old ladies brigade carrying their Oxygen tanks.

4. I"m actually considering doing it again, and maybe even the whole distance instead of just half.

5. I'm the guy in the blue shirt on the left.

English is tough stuff!

Dearest creature in creation,

study English pronunciation.

I will teach you in my verse

sounds like corpse, corps, horse, and worse.

I will keep you, Suzy, busy,

make your head and heart grow dizzy.

Tear in eye, your dress will tear,

so shall I! Oh hear my prayer.

When you correctly say croquet.

rounded, wounded, grieve and sleeve,

scenic, Arabic, pacific,

science, conscience, scientific,

tour, but our, and succour, four,

gas and alas and Arkansas.

Sea, idea, guinea, area,

psalm, Maria, but malaria;

youth, south, southern, cleanse and clean,

neither does devour with clangour;

soul but foul, and gaunt but aunt,

font, front, wont; want, grand and grant;

shows, goes, does; now first say finger,

and then singer, ginger, linger;

real, zeal, mauve, gauze, and gauge,

marriage, foliage, mirage, age.

Query does not rhyme with very,

neither does fury sound like bury,

dost, lost, post and doth, cloth, loth,

job, Job, bosom, oath;

though the difference seems little,

we say actual but victual;

refer does not rhyme with "deafer,"

foeffer does, and zephyr, heifer;

dull bull; and George, ate, late;

mint, pint, senate and sedate,

barn but earn, and wear and tear

do not rhyme with "here" and "ere."

Seven is right, but so is even,

hyphen, roughen, nephew, Stephen;

monkey, donkey, clerk and jerk,

ask, grasp, wasp; and cork and work;

doctrine, turpentine, marine;

dandelion with battalion;

sally with ally, yea, ye,

eye, I, ay, aye, whey, key, quay;

pronunciation -- think of Psyche!

Is a paling stout and spikey?

Won't it make you lose your wits

writing groats and saying grits!

-cut and pasted from: http://esperanto-usa.org/?q=node/84

How's your spiritual life going?

Its a common question. Well meaning church people ask it all the time. I've asked it, or some variant of it this week. All that being said, its kind of a bad question.

What exactly do I mean, by asking How's your spiritual life going? When someone asks me that I routinely respond with something like. (in a hang-dog voice) ...I'm not spending as much time with God as I should or as I want to...I need to pray more etc.

I like what John Ortberb said:

"Are you becoming more loving toward God and toward people? this...is the supreme spiritual diagnostic for Christ-followers who want to please him."


How am I changing? How are you changing? Are you changing? Without changing I'm just going through the motions, I'm just tying Bible verses to my head, and sitting on a cloth folding myself in half and facing east.

The question "How's your spiritual life going?" also compartmentalizes life more than I think God intends. Col 3:17 "Whatever you do whether in word or deed do it all in the name of the Lord Jesus."

I like what Brother Lawrence said:

"...(W)hat makes you think that God is absent from the maintenance shop but present in the chapel?...Holiness doesn't depend on changing our jobs, but in doing for God's sake what we have been used to doing for our own."

I want to be like that.


---
This post was inspired and adapted from Fully Devoted by John Ortberg et. al.

I have Dreams - Parental Guidance Suggested on this Post

I have dreams. Often I have the kind of dreams that trick me into thinking that they are reality while I'm having them. Mostly my dreams are stupid. Sometime they are terrifying, occasionally they are profound.

Recently I had dream that I was back in my old home town of Oblong, Illinois 62449. The details have become somewhat sketchy, but the emotions and major plot points remain. I owned some sort of business in the fair city of Oblong, and during a discussion with a rival businessman tempers flaired. The day was sunny, and the scene of the arguement was within view of my Aunt Patsy's garden. Aunt Patsy's garden is a unique collection of heirloom plants, native grasses, and whatever happened to be new and on sale in the seed catalog. There are no rows to speak of, but in good years the asymetrical patterns of vegetables, flowers, herbs and weeds are to me more pleasant than any formal English garden. I feel her humble kind heart beat in the tall purple okra and vining stretching summer sqarsh [sic].

While within view of this place that is so special to my heart, I was standing in a fictitious cinderblock out building, It was pure white, with perhaps freshly paint blocks.

...As the words escalated I felt increasingly frightened and threatened. After that it was somthing of a blur. I am still aware of my arms flailing and of some heavy blunt object in my right hand. The first strike was awkward, and felt I had to strike again or risk being swallowed in the fury of my rival's retaliation. When I felt the blow land I knew what had just happened. I had ended him. He fell limp and the crimson reflection on the floor was mine. It was a mess. I was at first terrified and then intensely focused. I hid the body. I'm not sure where.

Where ever it was it was not good enough. It was found. I was caught. The authorities were on the way to arrest me. My life was over. I had committed murder. The gravest desparation shrouded me. In a moment contemplated running, fighting, lying. I couldn' though. I was guilty. Any excuse was weak, and attempt to justify what I had done was completely out of the question. I don't know if its possible to convey the feeling that gripped me.

The sirens of the Sheriff's department were approaching...they were odd sirens...

They were in fact the whine of my ridiculous alarm clock.. I had been asleep. I was awake, and it was Easter Morning 2006.

I felt the Mercy of Christ ring through my being at that moment. I could not sigh deeply enough to signal my relief. I was caught, I was guilty, I was as good as on the galloes. For some reason beyond my understanding, it was his good pleasure to erase my sin.

Smoke on my clothes

"We cross our bridges when we come to them and burn them behind us, with nothing to show for our progress except a memory of the smell of smoke, and a presumption that once our eyes watered."
- Tom Stoppard

ACID PLANET

I just discovered ACID Planet. I like it, I discovered it last Wednesday when surfing out a daydream I had about selling one of my old Euphoniums. Why I have old Euphoniums and exactly what a Euphonium is, is another blog entry entirely. That being said, I found this guy who had posted all of his recorded Euphonium recordings on ACID Planet. Dozens and Dozens of tracks, and they were all pretty well done, as far as Euphonium recitals go.

Anyhow, in order to download the files I had to register, and when I did I discovered there was lots more independent/ original music on this site. Lots & Lots. Some of it is really good too. I have my account set only to see PG and lower ratings so I have no idea exactly how much there is but I'd say I've browsed close to 500 songs.

I have only ventured in to the instumental and electronic music, I'm scared of anything with lyrics right now, but I have discovered an unknown affinity for trance/goa music. I find that, if I put some on, I just fly through emails, and reading, and just am generally really productive on tasks that don't require human interaction. cool

Checkout Aidan Browne's "a secret rendezvous". Most of his music is guitar driven new agey stuff, I like it. I also like "Mass Hyonosis" by Infinite Dimensions.

Dear Afghan Judge - Touche

Afghan President Hamid Karzai, looks on while wearing his new "Realtree" Islamic beanie. Does anyone else think this guy looks like Dave Giammaria?





Time.com has a story about the trial and immemient death sentence of Abdul Rahman a recent convert to Christianity. The angle that Time is taking is that the president Hamid Karzai has a tight rope to walk in trying to please the people of his country, who according to the Time article want Mr. Rahman executed under the tenants of Islamic "Sharia" law. This of course being in direct contrast to every western nation with troops in the country, who are demanding that the man be set free.

The presiding judge in the case, Ansarullah Maulavizada is quoted as saying:

“In the West you allow two women to get married because that is the law and I respect that,” ...“In Afghanistan, we have Sharia law and the people respect and accept this.”

Touche
-jkh

On Tordoes and Vaction - a poem

I shall never forget that fateful day
When in my parents green Oldmobile I mispelled the word tornado.
I wanted to appear calm so I spelled it and did not say
it, because it seemed like what a grown up would do.

I didn't want to alarm my little brother in the seat by me
Well, kind of by me because those were the days when seatbelts
were a nuisance, and we would roam the car free.
You see the clouds were dark and winds were fierce as well climbed the hill in front of the
Stoy road stop sign.

In a sort of whispery wimper I eeked it out letter by letter.
I really didn't understand why my parents had such a long goofy pause.
Why my mom hid her mouth under her sweater,
and laughed because
I had spelled it wrong - ( you know the nose covered laugh, kind of like when someone farted in
6th grade study hall)

I would have turned more red right then
and been really embarassed had she not ran right into the back of the car in front
of us. I"m sure when
she reads this she won't recall the wreck, in fact I'm not entirely sure it ever happened...

It's one of those foggy memories of youth.

Later after I got married, I found out my wife had a similar story about mispelling the word vacation in a note to her parents. I'm sure that there was some kind of insurance conjuring event that happened after it too, there always is...

- end

P.S. Dear Cap, you asked for it.

Anonymous, who needs it?

I promised to rant on the evils of anonymous journalism. However, I have lost the urge. My comment is if you have something to say.. sign your name to it. Chesterton says,

"It is quite true that there is a young and beautiful fanaticism in which men do not care to reveal there names. But there is a more elderly and much more common excitement in which men do not dare to reveal them." - G.K. Chesterson All Things Considered

I tend to agree with him. If only all the anonimonty that folks crave was from pure motive then I wouldn't mind it. Then it would be something of humility, a virture instead of a vice. I mean how often does someone write a New York Times best sellar and not mind who gets the credit (and the royalties) for it.

Caveat Scientae

In my previous blog entry I made reference to John Seigenthaler SR's op/ed piece in USA Today. I have since re-read the article and have some thoughts.

John Seigenthaler states in his USA today op/ed piece;

"Naturally, I want to unmask my "biographer." And, I am interested in letting many people know that Wikipedia is a flawed and irresponsible research tool." **1

I understand that the kind of character assassination that Mr. Seigenthaler experienced from the WikiPedia Bio entry about him must have been very hurtful indeed. I agree with him that the biographer should be unmasked in some sense. Probably not in the same sense he would like but, I think (s)he should not have complete anonymity; more on that later. The statement that I really want to comment on, at least right off the bat is;

"...Wikipedia is a flawed and irresponsible research tool."

I have at least two problems with this assessment. The first is with his characterization of Wikipedia's flawed nature. I'm not about to defend any libelous material that may be, and probably is, still present on Wikipedia. I will however say that his assessment of it as being flawed, at least in my mind, betrays the fact that he believes that it should not be flawed. That is a misunderstanding of the highest order. All reference materials are flawed**2. Some are less flawed than others. To approach something as massive as Wikipedia and expect it to be flawless is a bit expecting the faucet to dispense whatever liquid you happen to be in the mood for at that moment. Wikipedia is a really cool resource, but it is not Stanley's GREAT BIG BOOK OF EVERYTHING, and it certainly does not have Don't Panic on the cover.

As a legal mind and a trained journalist I would hope that Seigenthaler could recognize Wikipedia and wikis in general for what they are. What exactly they are I don't know that I can say, but I can say definitely that they are not scholarly journals, no matter how much some people want them to be, they are not commercial encyclopedia's, and its silly to think they should try to be, (Some people are actually pushing for printing Wikipedia, which I think is the most assinine thing I've ever heard anyone propose about the use of its content) I would say that Encyclopedia Britannica in its 7 million year history has likely had a few hundred entries they wish they would have never written. And those were ostensibly subjected to stringent peer review and lots of high minded conversation and discussion, by experts in their respective fields. Wikipedia does not have a 7 million year history and doesn't always have a reviewer for each page.

If I may create a picture; I see traditional print encyclopedias as those cool looking stone lions outside of our nation's oldest public libraries. They are stately, regal, majestic, and representative of traditional learning and knowledge. They are safe lions. However they are stone so they don't change, at least not until someone paints gang graffiti on them or does one too many board grinds off the tail or nose of the beast. Even then they are basically the same, just defaced, or de"tailed" as the case may be. Wikipedia is nothing like this. Wikipedia is more like a griffin. Not a painting or statue of a griffin but an actual griffin. It is not a safe lion. While a griffin is cool and potentially useful, should you be able to harness/train it, it is still a griffin and anyone in their right mind is going to be scared out of their wits by it. This beast is alive, it has a cellular structure with stuff dying and being born. It is, like all living things, changing, fluxing.

Having said all that allow me to level some blame at Wikipedia for this perception that it should not be flawed. What have they done that I think is a bad idea? They have called themselves an encylopedia.

"Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia that anyone can edit" **3

By calling itself and encyclopedia Wikipedia has conjured up the baggage that that word carries. Some of which it is trying to free itself from, like undue commercial influence. It is however borrowing the legitimacy that the word carries with it too. I 'm how many of us copied the encyclopedia on any given subject in grade school as an authority for a history or science report. If you didn't know that answer to something and you were, like me, a particularly inquisitive kid, any given teacher or other adult, who probably just didn't want to be bothered, would say why do you go look that up. What did they mean? By in large I would say that meant go consult the WorldBook, or Encyclopedia Britannica, or if your school was slightly less wealthy, as mine was, Funk and Wagnalls, which I understand could be purchased bit by bit at a discount if you saved special coupons that the grocery store gave out.

All that to say, I would propose that Wikipedia is not an encyclopedia. It is in many ways like an encylopedia, just as the stone library lion is in many ways like a griffin. It is not, however, a griffin. Wikipedia is a wikipedia. Even the name speaks to its chimera nature. It is a new beast and in my view shouldn't be called an encylopedia. Call it a knowledge repository, or call it encyclopedia-like, or just call it what it is an information wiki.

(e.g. Wikipedia, the free knowledge repository that anyone can edit)
(e.g. Wikipedia, the free encylopedia-like entity that anyone can edit)
(e.g. Wikipedia, the information wiki that anyone can edit)

For the mis-marketing I blame the Wikipedia Foundation.

As for Mr. Seigenthaler's clame that Wikipedia is a research tool I cannot argue with that. There are thousands of articles that I, and many others have found useful in writing blog entries. It is really good for reminding you of stuff you should already know and for giving you a gloss of stuff you need to learn more about. Beyond that...

Is Wikipedia an irresponsible research tool? is the real question. Again, Mr. Seigenthaler is assuming that Wikipedia should be a responsible reasearch tool. (Whatever that is..) I suppose since it should be the Wikipedia Foundation calls it an encyclopedia. I can see that. So Wiki Foundation, if you are an encyclopedia you may very well be an irresponsible one. Will that keep me from using Wikipedia? Not likely. Why? Because I don't think Wikipedia is an encyclopedia. Because of that I don't think Wikipedia has the same responsibilty as an encyclopedia. The responsibility for the content is shared between the reader and the oligarchs of Wikipedia. Caveat Emptor.

A word on anonymous postings.

While I do believe anonymous speech should be protected. I don't think it should be take seriously. GK Chesterton had some great things to say about publishing and anonymity, but this entry is already way too long, so I'll save that for next time.



-footnotes-
**1 http://www.usatoday.com/news/opinion/editorials/2005-11-29-wikipedia-edit_x.htm

**2 I am of course referring to any reference book other than say the Bible or anything written by John Stott, CS Lewis, and GK Chesterton, not that the Bible is on par with those, I just like them too much and refuse to believe they are in error. (And Amanda Moore if you read this I am just kidding!)

**3 http://www.wikipedia.org

WikiPedia, Speech, & Freedom of Fiction

The recent roe in USA Today about Wikipedia started my thought process.

http://www.usatoday.com/news/opinion/editorials/2005-11-29-wikipedia-edit_x.htm

Here are the things I'm thinking about:

How are standard encyclopedia's written?
How is wikipedia written?
What are the pros and cons of each?
I guess the bigger question in my mind is how are scholarly arcticles *really* written.
This is a big question in my mind because I have always just kind of trusted them, without giving much thought as to how they were birthed. Hence the following:


***
As I understand it the current quality control for
scholarly articles is the process of peer review.

"How is peer review normally implemented, in conventional paper journals? The journal has an Editor and an Editorial Board. With some journals it is the Editor in Chief, with others it is the Editor in consultation with the Board, or with Action Editors, who selects the referees, usually one or two per manuscript, a third or more consulted if a deadlock needs to be broken. The referees advise the Editor(s) by submitting reports (sometimes anonymous, sometimes not) evaluating the manuscript and making recommendations about acceptance/rejection and revision. The reports are advisory rather than binding on the Editor, who makes the actual decision, but a good Editor chooses his referees well and then for the most part trusts them; besides, it is only the very narrow specialty journal whose Editor has the expertise to judge all submissions on his own. The idea of peer review is also to free publication from the domination of any particular individual's preferences, making it answerable to the peer community as a whole -- within the discipline or specialty. (Interdisciplinary journals always have added problems in achieving peer consensus, and indeed, even with specialty journals, referee disagreement rates suggest that consensus is more than one can expect from peer review; nor is it clear that it would be desirable; Harnad 1985**)."

**Harnad, S. (1985) Rational disagreement in peer review. Science, Technology and Human Values 10: 55 - 62.

Who writes encyclopedia articles?

Encyclopedia Britannica says that it is written by an editorial board of "the world's greatest minds". In addition there PR material is trustworthy because: a.) they've been doing the encyclopedia thing for a long time b.) Lots of people already trust them to do the right thing c.) They let people who win prestigious awards write/edit for them**
**http://www.britannica.com/premium/

I'm not saying that I disagree with them. I just find these to be interesting reasons. It seems to me that these are not really great reasons. It seems to me that they should be talking more about their process of ferretting out facts. I mean Wikipedia fulfils all of the same requirements as the Britannica PR, with the exception of we've been doing this for a long time. The one difference that I see between the two is that Joe average like myself does not have access to the edits or the prepublication documents that Britannica uses to build its articles. With Wikipedia I can see all of that from the beginning. If WikiPedia (as an institution or a process or an organ, whatever it is) has any fault in the false information that is contained in its pages I think that it is in not having some kind of "THIS IS VERIFIED BY TRUSTED WIKIPEDIA SOURCES AS NOT LIBELOUS" flag.

Some would argue that this kind of mechanism takes the democracy out of Wikipedia, in that someone has to stamp an article with final approval before it is considered legit.

I'm still processing a lot thoughts from this WikiPedia business and would like to hear the take of others. I am all for an organ of absolute free democratic speech. By democratic I mean not overtly false. I'm willing to leave lots of room for point of view, and even for point of view to be shaded into the presentation of facts. That's fine, spin is protected speech in my view, even if I disagree with it, or don't see it as spin. Lies and intentional falsifications however have no place in my freedom of the blog/wiki/cyber press. Unless they are presented as what they are...fiction. That's a lot of rambling. My lunch hour is officially over 5 min ago, so if there's anyone left who reads this blog...Fire Away.

RSSOwl my new friend

Recently I made friends with an owl. That's right, the owl is a traditional symbol of wisdom, a quiet, efficient hunter. RSSOwl's "big eyes" are a big help when scanning the Web's vast array of RSS sources. RSS or Really Simple Syndication, or Rich Site Summary if you prefer is a pretty amazing technology in that it allows me to read all the news I care about and a bunch that I kind of care about in about 15 min. I've got to get tuned into this RSS a bit more, because I could see how these feeds could be really helpful, especially on intranet sites that always need new content, but that nobody has time to update. You know stuff like calendar data, vacation days, upcoming server maintenance, birthdays, anniversaries and the like. It could really be useful. Or what if you could build it into the operating system and use the RSS data to as code alter the the computing experience on the fly, based on other environmentally important variables, like location, date time, current interest, or apps that you currently had open? RSS could be cool. I know that I'm extending it well beyond what its supposed to be, but I mean what if...

the management sincerely apologizes for the incoherance of this post..

Worth Reading; But Brace Yourself

I browsed BBC New's website today and came across this picture

The young girl in the picture at the right did not live through the mudslide that trapped her after a volcanic eruption in Columbia in 1985. BBC News tells the story of Frank Fournier the photographer who took this disturbing picture, in the article
Picture power: Tragedy of Omayra Sanchez.

I'm not a morbid person. However this story and this photo froze my happy-go-lucky web browsing and threw me into reflection. Not everyone has 60 hours to think about their imminent death. Then again we actually do, unless of course we fool ourselves into thinking that we aren't actually going to die. I think we all do that.

(The photograph used on this page was used without permission, and is the sole property of its owner. It will be removed at the owner's request)

CCH - New Facility

Yesterday I attended an EIU Christian Campus House board meeting. Before I left I thought I would snap a photos so that all of you who graduated from EIU and were a part of CCF could see the massive new auditorium. As they say, if you build it they will come....Last Sunday CCF attendance was 284 this past Sunday attendance 287. My guess is that they will completely fill the place (approximately 400) before the end of the school year.

It is really cool to see what God continues to do at Eastern. What can you do?

1. You can come to the September 11, 2005 building dedication at 3:00pm. This will show your support for the ministry and give great encouragement to an over worked Roger and staff.

2. You can write a big fat check and send it to CCH, 2231 S. 4th, Charleston IL 61920.

3. You can encourage all the folks you know to write big fat checks. There is still about $250,000 needed to retire the debt on the building. Email me for more info if you want help figuring out how to give to the CCH building fund.

My Old Truck

As a birthday gift I received a new Duralast battery for my old red truck. 650 CCA yeah!!
However the old battery was so corroded that it was a ton of work to get the thing running again. But with the help of my dad and my good neighbor Joe and about 6 hours of sweat the job is done. You're probably thinking: "How can it take 6 hours to change a battery." Well the battery leads were so corroded that it was impossible to get them off of the battery. Well the positive one anyway. But after taking the wheel off and jacking the thing up to the moon and getting really dirty it final had power.

Although it had power it would not start. It was turning over and seemed to be getting spark. So I say to Joe, "That gas in there is pretty old, how about I put in some fresh and see if that helps." So I went to the garage, got the can, opened the little door to the gas cap, and then - I wet myself... (see picture below right)


Over the previous weeks I had seen a few bees hanging around my truck, I assumed that they were foraging around in the brush pile in the back of my truck. I couldn't have been more wrong. So after gathering my composure and snapping the picture above, Joe and I set out to destroy the bees hopefully without getting stung. I don't know if you can see, but these are really big bees. Like twice the size of a honey bee. So the question then becomes, "How can we kill and entire hive of bees right now and not get stung even once?"

I had some insect killer that said "kills on contact", as did my neighbor Joe. His comment on that stuff was something to the effect of; "If we use that we'll get massacred, shoot I think you could probably drink that stuff." While I would never drink it and definitely warn all readers of this blog not to drink it, I agreed with the sentiment whole heartedly.

The answer; Brake Cleaner. (see picture above left)
Apparently, a mixture of Heptane, Xylene, Methyl Alcohol, and Ethylbenzene is really really bad news for bees. I backed my minivan up and turned the headlights on so we could see. (It was about 9:00 at night when we discovered the bees) He stood as close as he dared and emptied the can on the hive. After that the hive was quiet. "No noise suggests, No bees". No bees, Not one; they all dropped from the hive in a great big heap. One or two of what I would guess were the "tough guys" made it about 4 inches up the spray but then dropped as dead as the rest. When the can ran out we both stood there watching the mess waiting for more to come out of the depths or for survivors to resurrect from the pile. It didn't happen. I then finished off the rest of their bee infrastructure with a water hose and thoroughly cleaned the gas tank opening.

What we say on the ground was a natural amazement. Bees in every conceivable stage. Larva, Pupa, Pupa that were almost real bees. It was like watching the discovery channel. Except for the humidity, poor lighting, and smell of brake cleaner.

The next day my truck started just fine. Last Saturday I got rid of all the brush that had collected in it, but you know what? That didn't stop the bees. A contingent of about 20 bees must have been hiding out somewhere in some sort of Bee nuclear bunker or something because I have been fighting those bees consistently since I got rid of the hive. I guess the bee constitution insures that the vice-president bee be kept at an undisclosed safe location away from the hive in case shade tree mechanics decide to stage a complete overthrow of their government with EthleBezenizitonicmanfrengenson, or whatever that stuff was.

If I park the truck in a slightly different spot the (BIA) doesn't seem to be able to find the entrance to the old hive. I guess their (BPS) systems only work with exact locations and they can't exactly visually recognized that it is the same truck just backed in instead of heading straight in. Nevertheless I was pretty impressed that they came back to rebuild.

Not because I like hearing myself type anymore.

Today it dawned on me that now that I have actual readers for this blog I don't post nearly so often. I find myself thinking, no no no I can't type that its not witty or smart enough. OR If I type that they'll all think I'm a dork. I'm pretty sure that I don't have a lot of hope in the last category, but nonetheless, the pressure to produce keeps me from blogging. That is a pity really because when I started this blog it really was because I liked hearing myself type. I mean just because I liked to type and then read whatever popped into my brain. Oh Well.